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Is Restraint the Key to Improving EQ?



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I’ve been saying for a long time that when it comes to leadership, it’s not our IQ that matters nearly as much as our EQ does, or our level of emotional intelligence.

In a recent article by Dave Clark of TTI Success Insights, one of the keys to improving it is restraint. And in a world where it’s so easy to post negative comments about another person on the web via social media, it’s even more relevant.

But, what’s the difference between someone who acts out in anger and someone who seems relatively unfazed when negative words or information is shared? According to Dave…

it all boils down to emotional intelligence and how much power we allow those words to have over us.

What is Emotional Intelligence though?

Emotional Intelligence is our personal capacity to be aware of, control, and express our emotions. Moreover, it includes our ability, or lack thereof, to handle interpersonal relationships.

Also known as Emotional Quotient, or EQ, it is a term that was originally coined by psychologists John Mayer and Peter Salovey, but brought to prominence through the writings of Daniel Goleman.

As Dave Clark shared in his article, Goleman reflected on writing his 1995 groundbreaking book simply entitled Emotional Intelligence. According to Goleman, “Those were days when the preeminence of IQ as the standard of excellence in life was unquestioned; a debate raged over whether it was set in our genes or due to experience. But here, suddenly, was a new way of thinking about the ingredients of life success. I was electrified by the notion,” said Goleman.

So, why is emotional intelligence so important, and does restraint play a significant role in our ability to improve it?

Click Here to Find Out

“You will continue to suffer if you have an emotional reaction to everything that is said to you. True power is sitting back and observing things with logic. True power is restraint. If words control you, that means everyone else can control you. Breathe and allow things to pass.” – Warren Buffett


Why do you think EQ is so important in leadership today? Are there certain things you’ve done to improve your own emotional intelligence? Please comment below. I look forward to reading your leadership insights and interacting with you.

Dave Clark is the staff writer and editor at TTI Success Insights. He enjoys writing on a wide variety of subject matter in multiple formats. Also a performing musician, Dave is primarily driven by his Intentional and Harmonious Driving Forces.


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